Kids often understand more than we give them credit for. They know when something is wrong, they definitely know when something is right, and they act accordingly when we don’t sit down with them and talk about it. So, what are some of the best ways to talk to your children in a way that encourages them to open up to you whenever they need to? Here are some good tips for you to consider, and they can be good habits to easily get into.
The worst thing we can say to a child is ‘don’t cry,’ as it’s extremely limiting and immediately lets them know their parent doesn’t think of crying as an acceptable emotion – which makes tantrums worse and tensions run even higher because they don’t know how to express themselves.
As parents, we know this, and we don’t want to do this to our little ones. However, sometimes we can be a little short tempered ourselves and our tiredness can turn us into parents using techniques we don’t want to use. Make a conscious effort to make sure your child can cry whenever they want, and then talk to them about why they’re upset.
Let them take their time to work things out; emotions can be incredibly confusing as an adult, never mind as a child!
Talk to your children: Explain the Big Changes Properly
It’s unlikely that you’re going to drop the bomb and tell your child you’ve visited Austin Kemp Divorce Solicitors, unless they’re immediately pre-teen or older, but that doesn’t mean you can’t give unspecific details of anything that might affect how they perceive their life and position in a household.
Don’t let yourself or your child be backed into a formal corner, as that can feel extremely trapping and doesn’t do us any favours in terms of comfort or safety. So that means it needs to be a little friendlier, maybe when you’re both absorbed in an activity or out on a walk. Then get to their level and talk to your child properly; after all, you know how to do that best.
Talk to your children: Praise Them Specifically
This one is a good habit to get into no matter what, and it means your praise and affection means a whole lot more than it usually would. If your child likes to draw, build, or otherwise create, make sure you pick out certain parts of each creation and praise those.
Positive reinforcement is a lot better than negative reinforcement, and that means we need to keep a good spin on everything our children do. If your kid put some effort into something they’ve done, make sure the picture or writing goes on the fridge in pride of place. Try not to be vague with phrases like ‘good job!’ This could literally mean anything, and honestly just is a turn of phrase we use every day. Be precise and tell them exactly what they’ve done well.
Give it a think. There’s plenty of ways to talk to your children, so make sure you find the one that works best for all of you.
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